What do women really want?

Something's not connecting. When I ask women what they want when looking for a man, many say they want a man who

• respects them
• treats them nice
• is genuine and kind
• and listens to them them.

They describe the characteristics of a "nice guy" but when it comes to attraction, the same women will choose someone who is more of a "bad boy."

Here's my take on it (of course, generalizing, so don't get bent out of shape):

• Bad boys have a plan, even if you're not in on it, whereas nice guys may ask the tiresome question, "What do you want to do?" thinking they are being respectful of what you want
• Bad boys seem to know how to create attraction in women. Nice guys will sometimes make a move on a woman prematurely, without having established an attraction in her or they have no idea how to create an attraction (or possibly even that it's necessary)
• Women know when bad boys are interested in them; nice guys tend to be afraid of making a move. Unfortunately for the nice guys, women begin to wonder, "Is he interested?" or even worse, "Is he gay?"
• Bad boys are unpredictable and exciting. Nice guys are not.
• Bad boys are a challenge. They are hard to get in touch with or pin down. You may get mad at them, but you still want them.
• Nice guys offer to mow your lawn when you've only had two dates. While that's very thoughtful, it doesn't create attraction.

Now that I've given some of my thoughts, I want your opinion: What makes a bad boy attractive? Of course, millions of "nice guys" want to know, too. Please contribute! Your opinion counts!

And while you're at it, if you are a "nice guy" reading this, I want to talk to you. I'm in the process of creating a program to help you attract women while remaining a "good guy" and shedding the "nice guy" image. Sign up for my project at http://www.trueloveafter40.com. I need to hear your opinions and learn your frustrations in a no obligation phone interview. I look forward to talking with you!

Thanks, Michelle
Michelle E. Vásquez, MS, LPC
Your Successful Singles Relationship Coach